


Believe Me, For a Little While

by unalignedant



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Keith whump, M/M, Mind Control, Pidge has a potty mouth, Sappy, ot5 feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-09
Updated: 2016-08-09
Packaged: 2018-08-07 14:02:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7717591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unalignedant/pseuds/unalignedant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Keith wakes up because a giant dog is licking his face.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Believe Me, For a Little While

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry, Keith, but you were easier to write than Shiro, so you have to suffer. This is un-beta’d: I apologize for any mistakes and if I butchered any “tech” stuff; Google was my only resource. Title is from “For a Little While” by Langhorne Slim. I also may or may not have lifted an infamous line from Supernatural, but it fit, so it stays.

Keith wakes up because a giant dog is licking his face.

He instantly recoils before he realizes what woke him, slamming into the wall next to the bed while reaching for the knife under his pillow and not finding it.

_Wait, a knife? Why would he have a knife?_

His heart is beating a million miles a minute as he stares at the dog suspiciously; it’s an enormous mutt with fur every color possible. The dog pants happily, feet up on the big bed, tail wagging energetically. Keith blinks, his mind feeling foggy and panicked, but he has no idea why.

“Volt, _no_ ,” he hears Shiro say from outside the open door to the room, and Keith relaxes slightly because _okay, it’s Shiro_ , but when he looks at the door when Shiro enters, an unusual spike of alarm shoots through him.

“Not on the bed!” Shiro says to the dog, who goes running to the door to slam into Shiro’s legs. Shiro smiles down at the dog. “You know Keith doesn’t like that, you big dummy.”

Keith stares at Shiro and swallows, blinking rapidly in confusion and his panic not abating. Shiro’s still talking nonsense to the dog with a big grin on his face, and he’s wearing black jogging sweats hiked up over his ankles, a pair of well-worn looking sneakers, and a red t-shirt with a faded swoosh logo, _Nike, the swoosh means Nike_ , and the sleeves jaggedly cut off. _There’s something wrong._

“Sorry,” Shiro says to Keith with a smile, perching on the edge of the bed and Keith just looks at him anxiously. _Something is wrong_. “I tried to let you sleep in while I took him for a run, but obviously he had other ideas.” He leans in and gives Keith a quick kiss and Keith jerks backwards like he’s been hit, eyes wide. _Why did Shiro kiss him?_

“Wh--” Keith stammers, heart racing. “Where are we? Where did that dog come from?”

Shiro frowns. 

“Are you okay?” Shiro asks, concerned. He reaches out to put the back of his hand against Keith’s forehead and Keith panics but lets him. “Are you sick?”

“What? No,” Keith starts, looking a bit wildly around his room, _no, wait, it’s_ their _room_. “I--I don’t--”

“Did you have a nightmare?” Shiro asks. The dog sits next to Shiro’s legs and puts its head on the bed. Keith stares at both of them, his mind trying to muddle through a haze.

“No,” Keith says slowly. The dog barks and Keith jumps. Shiro puts a hand on the dog’s head and continues to look at Keith with worry etched all over his face, crinkling the scar across his nose that he got playing football in college. _Football? That can’t be right._

“Are you _sure_ you’re alright--”

“ _Yes_ ,” Keith snaps, even though he feels far from it. “Sorry, I just--I’m not--”

“It’s okay,” Shiro says easily, concern changing to a soft, soothing smile. He puts a hand against Keith’s cheek and Keith inhales sharply. “Even Volt should know better than to wake the sleeping dragon,” Shiro says with a teasing grin, ruffling Keith’s hair, the gesture so painfully familiar.

“Volt,” Keith says carefully, looking down at the dog, who wags his tail at the mention of his name. Named because Katie wanted to name him Bolt, but Lance insisted adding a “v” would somehow make it “more sci-fi”, and Katie surprisingly agreed. Volt was a year old next month. _Keith suddenly feels sick._

“Did you want to go for a run with us?” Shiro asks and Keith swallows. “Since you’re up?”

They try to run together every day, but Shiro’s teaching job and Keith’s classes sometimes get in the way. That, and the fact that Keith is decidedly not a morning person. Hunk took a psychology class once and he likes to say that sleeping in is Keith’s subconscious way of defying all the different schedules and routines Keith grew up with in different foster homes, but Keith is pretty sure that that’s a load of junk and he just happens to like sleeping.

“No, thanks,” Keith says, trying to clear the fog in his brain. _What’s wrong?_ “I promised to help Lance study, anyway,” he hears himself say, a split second of severe confusion before his brain supplies _heat transfer lab. He and Lance are in the same heat transfer lab this semester._

“Okay,” Shiro says with a smile, but still eyeing Keith bemusedly. “I might not see you before you leave for class, then,” he says, and leans in for another kiss. Keith automatically kisses back, pulse fluttering, and something seems to settle in his mind. _It feels right_. “C’mon, you fluffy moron,” Shiro says affectionately to the dog, _Volt_ , rising and heading to the door. Volt follows rapidly, tail beating back and forth excitedly.

“Later, babe,” Shiro says over his shoulder as he leaves the room, and Keith feels something strange in the pit of his stomach. He tries to quash it, and it goes easier than it did earlier.

“Oh,” Shiro says suddenly with a grin, appearing back around the doorframe. “Hunk made breakfast, so I’d hurry if I were you,” he says, like always, even though he knows Keith hardly ever eats breakfast. “Love you,” Shiro adds, and Keith’s heart skips a beat, a weird feeling like a weight lifting off his shoulders, before he notices the calm settling in, and he’s suddenly wondering why anything could have felt wrong only minutes ago. Shiro smiles brightly before disappearing down the hall, and Keith feels the confusion calmly melt off of his own face, like it had never been there before, and he finally breathes easily.

 _I love you, too_ , he thinks, and everything feels normal again.

*

Their bedroom is on the second floor, attached to a bathroom in what would have been a master suite if the house wasn’t constantly being rented by an ever-rotating bunch of college-age kids who either currently attend the local university or did up until recently. Lance and Hunk’s rooms are down the hall, and Katie took over Matt’s room on the first floor when he got hired at their dad’s company in their hometown last year. It works because she isn’t forced to share the other second floor bathroom with either Hunk or Lance, though the fact that she’s just as gross as either of them means anyone visiting the house and needing to use the downstairs bathroom is in for a nasty surprise.

“ _Finally_ ,” Lance says when Keith finds him in the kitchen, or at least that’s what it sounds like he says, his mouth otherwise full of what Keith assumes is Hunk’s morning specialty of eggs and Portuguese sausage. “I thought sleeping beauty was gonna snooze all morning and miss the test,” Lance continues after swallowing, stabbing a fork in Keith’s general direction. Keith rolls his eyes.

“I have an alarm on my phone, don’t I?” Keith asks rhetorically, making a beeline for the coffee pot and filling a cup. He sits across from Lance at the kitchen table and puts his cup down on the seemingly only non-occupied space; Lance has his books and notes sprawled all across the tabletop.

“Yeah, _right_ ,” Lance scoffs. “Shiro woke you up, don’t even lie.”

“Whatever,” Keith says absently. “Do you want help or not?”

“No, I--” Lance starts, suddenly serious and looking down at his books. “Studying together last night really helped. Thanks, by the way,” he looks up at Keith earnestly, then drops his eyes self-consciously again. “I’m just--I’m psyching myself out, is all, I think--”

“You’ll be fine,” Keith says firmly, sipping the terrible but still fortifying coffee. “You’ve got this.”

“Easy for you to say,” Lance mutters, fingers tracing along his notebook. Keith feels bad that Lance is stewing about this so much, but isn’t sure what to say to make him feel better. Hunk or Shiro are way better at navigating through the multitude of Lance’s moods.

“C’mon,” Keith says, glancing at his watch. “We should get going, anyway.”

Lance looks at the clock over the stove and his eyes go wide.

“Shit,” he yelps, attempting to dump all his books into his bag at once and shoving a piece of toast in his mouth. Keith finishes his coffee and hefts his bag onto his back. He stands and yanks an elastic off his wrist, reaching back to gather his hair into a tail to tie up so it’ll fit under his motorcycle helmet. Lance is shrugging into his comically oversized army jacket when he looks over at Keith and groans dramatically.

“Dude,” Lance says as they make their way to the back door, handing Keith his half-eaten toast, which Keith finishes mindlessly. “You need a haircut, like, _yesterday_. That mullet is _out of control_.”

Keith comes to an abrupt halt, feeling insanely dizzy, the entire house seeming to rotate wildly under his feet. He inhales sharply and puts a hand out against the wall to steady himself, but it’s a few seconds before the world reasserts itself. He stares wide-eyed at Lance, who is already at the door and looking back at Keith in confusion.

“Uh, you okay?” Lance asks, picking up his helmet from its spot by the door near everyone else’s.

“What--what did you just call me?” Keith asks breathlessly, no longer dizzy but hearing a weird ringing in his ears.

“I didn’t call you anything,” Lance says, eyebrow raised. “Are you getting sick? You look like you saw a ghost, man.”

“What?” Keith asks, blinking at Lance and trying to steady his breathing. _What just happened?_ “No, I--”

“Good,” Lance says, yanking his helmet on. “Because if you won’t let me drive your bike there’s literally _no way_ I’m taking the bus. Let’s go!” Lance flails his arms emphatically and heads outside.

Keith stares after him and frowns, confused and a little alarmed. _Nerves about the test, maybe?_

He shakes his head, _couldn’t be, he’s only been nervous maybe three times in his entire life_ , and he notices his riding gloves set carefully on the hall table. Shiro gave them to him for his birthday last year; they fit perfectly the first time and have only grown soft and supple ever since, and he almost never leaves the house without them even though plenty of people give him shit for wearing them even if he’s not on his bike. He reaches out instinctively and grabs them, relaxing at the feel of them in his hands. He takes a deep breath as he pulls them on, feeling completely better, as if that weird dizziness had never happened. 

By the time he grabs his helmet and meets Lance in the yard, he’s put the incident out of his mind.

*

The test is uneventful, though Keith does spare more than a few thoughts for how Lance might be faring, and the rest of the day passes much the same. He only has one other class so he runs a few errands (Hunk sends a completely detailed but still completely incomprehensible text about a spice he wants Keith to get and Keith has to go to three separate ethnic grocery stores before he finds it) before swinging back by the library to pick up Lance, who moans loudly the entire ride home about their test that morning. Thankfully, Lance can never hear him over the roar of the motorcycle even if he wanted to respond, so he just stays quiet and lets Lance rant in his ear.

He wordlessly drops off Hunk’s spice in the kitchen where Hunk is already cooking either dinner, or homework for one of his culinary classes, or some kind of science experiment (it’s increasingly hard to tell the difference when Hunk’s so into molecular gastronomy these days), waving off Hunk’s enthusiastic thanks and leaving Hunk to his usual role as Lance’s sounding board when Lance drops melodramatically into a kitchen chair.

After stepping over Volt on the kitchen floor, who’s watching Hunk alertly for any dropped food and simultaneously nosing at Lance’s hands for a pet, Keith heads upstairs to his and Shiro’s room to drop off his stuff and change to go for a run since he skipped out that morning. He heads back out to run a quick three miles in the neighborhood, and it isn’t until he’s showered and changed again and sitting on the edge of their bed that he realizes how early it still is, and that Shiro should be home in about twenty minutes. He lays back, resolved to just wait instead of trying to start any classwork or housework, and decides that a quick nap is probably deserved. It is Friday, after all.

He distantly hears Lance and Hunk chattering and producing various kitchen noises, and thinks he hears Katie’s voice entering the fray before he’s dozing off, mind wandering to strange places, wondering vaguely if he remembered to turn off the simulation robot on the training deck.

*

_He’s dreaming he’s flying._

_The controls in his ship are strange, but he uses them like he was born knowing how, and the terrain far below him and dropping away rapidly looks totally alien, but then they all do nowadays. He’s in orbit among the stars around the purple-looking planet before he can think twice._

_“Okay, Red?” He asks, as usual, and feels the familiar rumbling around him and in his mind that lets him know She’s fine._

_“Keith?” Shiro’s voice patches through the comm in his helmet. “All clear?”_

_“Yes, sir,” Keith says with a grin, angling the controls in the direction of the rendezvous point where the rest of the team will be waiting._

_“Roger that,” Shiro says, and Keith can hear the grin in his voice, too. “See you soon.”_

_“Soon,” Keith replies._

_He’s dreaming he’s flying, and it feels like a memory._

*

“Hey.”

Shiro’s voice is soft in his ear, but Keith still wakes with a start, heart pounding and gasping a heavy breath, arms instinctively snapping out and immediately knocking into something solid. He blinks in confusion at Shiro laying casually alongside him in bed, _since when do they share a bed, they’re just friends, no matter how long Keith has wanted otherwise_. Shiro’s chest is blocking Keith’s arms from going much of anywhere, and Keith looks up, meeting Shiro’s eyes and relaxing fractionally because _of course they’re a couple, have been for years._

“Ah, sorry,” Shiro says quickly, tightening his arm around Keith’s waist. “Didn’t mean to startle you,” he says with an apologetic smile. “You just looked so cute, napping, and mumbling something about lions. I couldn’t resist.” He presses a kiss to Keith’s forehead and Keith swallows thickly. _Was he worried about something?_

“Wha--lions?” Keith manages, heart still racing and his mind feeling muddled and a sliver of alarm trailing through his brain. _What was he dreaming?_ “I don’t--” he starts, then stops. Shiro raises an eyebrow in silent concern, and Keith blinks rapidly, taking a deep breath and quieting his mind, and when Shiro smiles again, Keith forgets what he was even going to say. “Keep calling me cute, Takashi,” he says sardonically instead, narrowing his eyes for effect. “See what happens.” Shiro just laughs, and Keith feels more ease flood into his bones.

“I’ll probably end up losing an arm,” Shiro says amenably, and something twists inside Keith’s gut for a split second. “How was the test?” Shiro continues, and Keith exhales slowly. “I asked Lance and he said it was tough.”

“Oh,” Keith says, rubbing his fingers against his temple, even though his head doesn’t actually hurt, it just felt weird for a second, there. “It was fine.”

“Good,” Shiro says, running a hand soothingly along Keith’s side. Keith relaxes.

“How was work?” Keith asks.

“Pretty good,” Shiro says, ever the optimist. “You hungry? I think there’s food in the kitchen.”

“Sure,” Keith says. 

Shiro leans close for a kiss and Keith obliges. It’s soft, and sweet, and Keith feels the pressure in his head shake loose and fall away.

“C’mon,” Shiro says, climbing off the bed with a smile, waiting for Keith to follow.

He does.

*

Hunk and Lance have already eaten and gone out to a movie, so it’s just the two of them eating together. Hunk’s concoction is good, as usual, if completely unidentifiable. Friday nights Keith and Shiro usually spend drinking beer and binge-watching their favorite sci-fi shows on Netflix, but tonight Shiro has a few papers to grade first. He asks Keith to take Katie some dinner because if no one reminds her to eat on the weekends she usually forgets until like four AM. Keith sends her a text when he’s outside her door with a plate balanced on one hand, because knocking does no good against her noise canceling headphones, especially since they’re usually blaring some unholy racket she calls music. Luckily she rigged her phone to forward text alerts to her computer.

“ _Enter_!” she shouts cheerfully through the door after a few seconds.

He opens the door, stepping carefully to avoid her constant mess strewn across the floor and also to dodge Volt when he sneaks in behind Keith’s legs, bounding happily to where Katie is sitting cross-legged in her desk chair typing furiously on her computer. She absently puts a hand out to pat him on the head.

Keith looks for a place to put the plate down on her desk, but covered in computer paraphernalia as it is, there’s hardly room for even a cup. He settles for simply holding it up so she can see it and when she notices it, she smiles gratefully and tugs off her headphones.

“Ooh, thanks,” she says, tucking her shortly cropped hair behind her ear and taking the plate.

“No problem,” he says as she starts to eat. He glances at her computer screen and sees a small image of Lance making a goofy face blinking in the bottom corner, next to one of his own, which isn’t blinking, and is mostly just looking at the camera in confusion. He smiles wryly.

“Ignoring Lance’s texts?” he asks, and she rolls her eyes as she swallows a bite of food, but smiles.

“For some reason the idiot feels the need to keep up a running commentary on his every fucking move, including notes on _all_ the trailers before whatever pile of shit he and Hunk are watching right now,” she says, shaking her head. “The worst part is he only uses shitlord textspeak,” she adds, and Keith laughs and eyes the rest of her screen.

“What are you working on?” he asks, because she likes when he does, even if her enthusiastic explanations sometimes sound like Greek to him.

“Authentication protocols,” she says, eyes glinting behind her glasses. She balances the plate precariously on some equipment next to her and types a few things to bring up more lines of script on her screen. “Here,” she says, and Keith leans closer. “Kerberos is fine, but all the authorizations are controlled by a centralized KDC, and--”

Keith doesn’t hear the rest of it; he feels like he’s been punched in the stomach, like all the air is suddenly missing from his lungs, like the room around him has flickered out of existence for a split second, and he feels like he’s going to be sick. He’s immediately dizzy, heart pounding, and he drops down to a crouch to put his hand against the ground for support, still feeling like the room is reeling.

“Keith?” he hears Katie ask worriedly, her face materializing next to his and and a hand appearing on his shoulder. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“I--” Keith manages, breathing hard. “Were--why were we talking about the mission to Pluto?”

“What?” Katie asks, alarmed. “Fuck, hang on,” she says and Keith hears her run to the door and shout for Shiro and Keith is anxious again. _Don’t talk to Shiro about the mission, it’s still too sensitive._

Keith sits down on the floor next to where Volt has been sitting and quietly whining. Keith’s mind is spinning wildly and he doesn’t know why. He looks up when Shiro enters with Katie trailing on his heels and talking rapidly.

“--some shit about Pluto, but--”

“Pidge, quiet for a second,” Shiro says to her calmly, concerned eyes on Keith, and Keith jerks like he’s been slapped. _Pidge?_

“Hey, hey,” Shiro says to him soothingly, hand gently cradling Keith’s jaw and Keith stares at him, eyes wide. “It’s okay, you’re okay. What happened?”

Keith blinks and tries to steady his heartbeat, and Shiro just looks at him quietly, waiting. Shiro rubs a thumb across his cheek and Keith swallows thickly, trying to even out his breathing. Shiro calls her Pigeon, his brain supplies, _Pidge_ , because of the time when she couldn’t have been older than six but managed to catch a pigeon and let it loose in Matt’s room when Shiro was over the Holt house playing video games. _That’s right, isn’t it?_

“I--don’t know,” Keith says, jumping slightly when Volt nudges against his arm. Shiro frowns, concerned.

“Well, your pupils are a little dilated, but that’s all I can see,” Shiro says, settling his other hand on Keith’s shoulder, and Keith takes a deep breath. “What happened?” Shiro asks again.

“I don’t know, I--” Keith starts, practically feeling the soft warmth radiating out from under Shiro’s comforting hand. “I must have zoned out, or something, and got dizzy.”

“I know my shop talk is boring, but it’s not _that_ boring,” Katie says with a smile over Shiro’s shoulder, though her eyes still look concerned.

“Right, sorry,” Keith says, shaking his head to clear the confusion. _What exactly was so confusing?_

“It’s okay,” Shiro says, smiling and squeezing his fingers on Keith’s shoulder, and Keith nods, even though he feels like something is entirely _not_ okay.

“C’mon,” Shiro says, standing and offering a hand to Keith. “Let’s go watch TV, chill out a little.” 

Keith hesitates, but takes Shiro’s hand and hauls himself to his feet, some of the tension spilling out through his feet, but it’s still there

“I’ll make popcorn,” he says, forcing a small smile, and Shiro smiles back.

*

They watch a couple of episodes curled up in bed before Keith feels more relaxed, and then Shiro is shifting so he can mouth wetly against the side of Keith’s throat. Keith half-heartedly bats at Shiro’s wandering hands because if this is going to progress any further they need to move Keith’s laptop off the bed first. Shiro just huffs a quick laugh and pulls Keith into a proper kiss, which Keith eagerly allows, laptop be damned. They lazily kiss and paw at each other for a little while before they hear the door downstairs slam loudly and a huge racket caused by Hunk and Lance’s return.

“We should shut the door,” Shiro mumbles against Keith’s lips, and Keith is wondering why they left the door to their room open in the first place. 

The racket downstairs only increases in volume when they hear Katie’s voice added to the mix, and Keith’s concentration on where he’d next like to put his hands on Shiro wavers slightly when he hears Lance shriek both of their names up the stairs.

“Does he ever shut up?” Keith wonders aloud, and Shiro laughs.

“ _Shiro! Keith!_ ” Lance screams again, and they both sigh resignedly.

“Better see what he wants,” Shiro says ruefully, sliding his hand up Keith’s thigh one more time. “Then we can come back up here and shut the door.”

By the time they reach the living room Lance is gesticulating wildly in some kind of reenactment while Hunk sits on the couch with his head in his hands and Katie sits next to him watching both of them, managing to look both unimpressed and amused at the same time.

“God, guys, _finally_ \--” Lance starts.

“Lance, you totally _interrupted_ ,” Katie says, throwing scare quotes around the last word and smiling mischievously. Keith rolls his eyes and Katie triumphantly shouts, _“See?”_

“Gross,” Lance says shortly, then continuing as if there had been no interruption. “Hunk’s got a _girlfriend_ ,” Lance singsongs, capering around the room while Hunk groans. Shiro perches on the arm of the couch and Keith sinks into the armchair, narrowly dodging Lance’s flailing limbs.

“She’s _not my girlfriend_ ,” Hunk says, his voice almost a plea. “She’s just a girl--”

“--that you met--” Lance says.

“--that I met--”

“--at the movie theater.”

“--at the movie theater,” Hunk finishes.

“She was taking her grandma to the movie and Hunk totally got her number,” Lance says haughtily, almost as if he’d done it himself.

“You got a girl’s number who was on a date with her _grandmother_?” Katie asks, bursting into a fit of giggles. “Holy _fuck_ , that’s funny, shit guys, wow--”

“Whatever,” Hunk mutters. “She’s really nice!” he says. “She works down at the animal shelter with her brother.”

“That’s nice,” Shiro says honestly. “What’s her name?”

“Shay,” Hunk says, shyly, and Keith frowns, something flickering in the back of his mind, _maybe he recognizes the name from somewhere_ , but then Hunk glances over at him with a hopeful look, and Keith gives him a small grin and a quick thumbs up.

“She’s foreign,” Lance is saying.

“Yeah,” Hunk agrees. “From, uh--”

“Balmain?” Lance guesses.

“That’s a _clothing designer_ \--” Katie says.

“Balmera?” Hunk tries.

“Do you mean _Balmoral_?” Katie asks incredulously. “Like _England_ or _Australia_? Oh my god you guys are _so dumb_ \--”

“Keith?” Shiro asks sharply, concerned, but Keith only distantly hears him, the sound echoing in Keith’s ears as he doubles over in the chair. The room is tilting under him and there’s a dull pain in his brain, rippling outwards and he shudders with a gasp.

“Keith, hey,” Shiro is saying frantically, crouching in front of Keith’s chair, and Keith desperately grips his right wrist, _why is it skin and not metal_ , and feels the closest thing to fear he’s felt in a long time.

“What--what’s happening to me?” Keith asks, voice tight, panic still rising.

“Hey, nothing,” Shiro says soothingly, putting his hands on Keith’s shoulders and gently moving him back into a sitting position, locking their eyes for a few seconds, and Keith takes a deep breath, anxiety not trickling away like usual. Shiro moves a hand to tenderly brush Keith’s hair off his forehead. “You’re okay,” he says, and Keith tries to nod, but he feels panicked.

He slowly becomes aware of the other three watching in concern and he looks back at Shiro and tries harder to push away whatever is muddling his brain, but it refuses to budge.

“--happened earlier,” Katie is saying with a frown. “Maybe--”

“I _thought_ you looked sick this morning,” Lance says, pointing a finger at Keith accusingly, but worry tinging his voice.

“There’s something wrong,” Keith insists, even though he doesn’t know why. “We’re not supposed to be here.”

“What, the living room?” Hunk asks worriedly.

Suddenly there’s a dog nosing at Keith’s side, and he blinks down at it in confusion.

“Volt, stop,” Shiro says, and something frantic bubbles to the top of Keith’s brain, something refusing to be ignored.

“ _Voltron_ ,” he breathes unsteadily, and instantly the room flickers, images flashing in his head of a giant powerful robot, of all of them in uniform, of a glittering castle that flies through space, of battles against an enslaving empire. 

He feels a stab in his head like a knife, chokes out a gasp, and passes out.

*

__  
_He’s dreaming, and he’s dreaming in red._

_Alarms are blaring, piercing the normally quiet cockpit, flashing warning red and white lights. Red is rumbling in alarm around him, and he’s struggling frantically to get a visual feed on what’s hit them because he can’t get Her to move._

_“Keith!” Shiro’s voice patches through. “We’re almost to you, just hang on!”_

_Keith only grunts in response, finally bringing up a visual on the Galra ship off to his right that hit Red with some kind of paralyzing blast. It’s not moving any closer, which is strange, it’s just hovering nearby. Waiting._

_“Negative,” Keith says vehemently. “This is a trap. Red’s not responding, I can’t move.”_

_“I’ll tow you if I need to,” Hunk says over the comm._

_“How many of them are there, buddy?” he hears Lance ask._

_“I don’t know,” Keith replies. “I can only see one, but--”_

_“There he is!” Pidge says excitedly, and Keith looks up and sees all four of them ahead, speeding towards him where he’d been attacked just short of reaching the rendezvous point._

_“Keith!” Shiro shouts suddenly, and Keith jerks in alarm. “There’s something behind you!”_

_Keith desperately tries to get a visual while simultaneously preparing to fire behind him blindly if he can’t. He has just enough time to brace for the recoil when Red shudders violently, a direct hit from behind, a wave of some kind of energy punching through Her, passing over Keith before winking out completely. He gasps, it’s like a shock of ice water, like a punch of a fist in his gut, like his brain has been electrified. His entire body goes limp, a ringing in his ears, and a wall of red slams down in front of his eyes before they shut, too._

_“Keith!” he hears Shiro scream wildly, before he loses consciousness._

_He’s dreaming in red, and it feels like reality._  
  
*

Keith wakes up gulping for air, covered in sweat and a dull ringing still in his ears. He looks around in a panic, sees Shiro leaning over him and feels Shiro’s hand against his face.

“You pilot the Black,” Keith chokes, and Shiro’s brow only creases further with worry. 

“--a _hospital_ ,” Katie is saying, _no, Pidge, her name is Pidge_.

“Let’s try next door first,” Hunk says. “Allura should still be awake.”

“ _Allura_ ,” Keith gasps, a flood of ice shooting through his veins. _Allura is Princess of Altea_. He grabs his head and yanks at his hair because isn’t she their neighbor who’s studying to be a nurse? _It hurts._

“See, he wants to see Allura,” Lance says, trying to sound helpful and pulling out his phone. “I’ll call her.”

“This is _serious_ , Lance,” Katie says warningly. “Don’t hit on her.”

“He knows the difference,” Shiro says to her, but his eyes on Keith. Keith looks at him, and feels pain. 

“I’m sure it’s just school stress,” Shiro says, trying to sound calm. “And I told you not to pick up any shifts at the garage when you have tests. Let’s--let’s see what Allura says, though, okay?” Shiro asks him, and Keith nods weakly. Shiro presses a kiss to his forehead and Keith shuts his eyes, wanting nothing more than to simply lean into him and not feel like he’s drowning. He tries to block out the images in his brain but they won’t go away, and he feels like he doesn’t belong, like the world is a hazy copy of what it should be. Voltron isn’t a real word, _it_ is _a word, and it’s a weapon, the most powerful weapon in the universe_ , but it won’t stop pulsing in his thoughts and making it hard to breathe.

“Something’s wrong,” Keith whispers, and that, at least, feels right.

*

Allura shows up not long after, her Uncle Coran in tow because, even though they live directly next door, he’s been borderline psychotically overprotective of her after her father passed away and walking the short distance between their houses at night is too dangerous in his mind. She sets down a bag of what Keith assumes is some of her nursing school supplies and plants herself on the coffee table so she’s on an eyeline with Keith in the armchair.

“Tell me what happened,” she says simply, in her soft, lilting accent.

“Well, he--” Lance starts.

“Not you,” Allura says, silencing him effectively with just a look. 

“Princess, perhaps--” Coran starts.

“Uncle, _please_ don’t call me that,” Allura says exasperated, and Keith swallows thickly and feels his heartbeat speed up because _she_ is _a princess, she’s been one for over ten thousand years_. 

“Keith,” Allura says to him quietly, and Keith hears, _Keith, you will fly the Red Lion_ , his eyes go wide and he looks at her in shock.

“I--I’m a Paladin of Voltron,” Keith says, not knowing where the words came from but knowing they feel correct, somehow, and he sees an image in his head of _Voltron, the defender of the universe, and he pilots Red, Voltron’s right arm_. He inhales sharply, blinking. Allura narrows her eyes and gently puts her hands on his skull, fingers searching for bumps.

“Did he fall?” she asks, looking around the room at the others.

“No,” Shiro answers, coming to crouch next to Allura so he’s looking at Keith. “He woke up funny, though,” Shiro continues, putting a hand on Keith’s shoulder. “What happened when you woke up?”

_woke up, wake up_

Keith’s looking at Shiro and Allura and can see their mouths moving but can no longer hear them. He hears something else, something echoing in his head.

_“...if he does not wake up on his own, the spell will continue to drain him,” Allura is saying. “The healing pod has done all it can to remove the impact of the spell, but unless he can break out of it, it will drain him until there is nothing left. Whatever the spell is showing him is designed to keep him there, to keep him from breaking free.”_

_“How did the Druids manage to weaponize a spell?” Pidge asks. “And shoot it through space at him like that?”_

_“I do not know,” Allura says, sounding disturbed._

_“Mullet!” Lance shouts. “Can you hear me?”_

_“What else can we do?” Hunk asks._

_“Keith,” Shiro says, voice quiet and sad, sounding much closer than the others. “Please wake up. Whatever you’re seeing, it isn’t real. I know it seems like it, and it probably seems wonderful, but. Please, we need you.” There’s a pause, and Shiro’s voice is desperate. “I need you.”_  
  
Keith jumps to his feet, the room coming into focus rapidly like a fast forward timelapse. He feels dizzy and steps away toward the hall.

“Keith?” Shiro asks.

“Stop,” Keith says, looking at him, then all of them, “You--this is wrong, I remember--” he says. He remembers a shack in the desert, remembers grief and disbelief at the failure of the Kerberos mission, remembers Lance, Hunk and Pidge crash landing into his life at the same time Shiro crash landed back on Earth. He remembers Voltron. _He remembers_.

“Voltron,” Keith says wildly. “Voltron is real, this--this room isn’t--” the room wavers slightly and Keith inhales. “This life _isn’t real._ ” He remembers their team, working together to protect the universe, he remembers being attacked and being hit with some kind of energy wave, _a spell_.

“Keith, hey,” Shiro says, scared, coming over to him and Keith backs away, even though Shiro looks upset when he does. “Listen,” Shiro says, slowly approaching and Keith can’t help but let him put his hands on Keith’s arms. “Just calm down,” Shiro says softly, eyes deep and serious, _Keith loves him so much_. “I need you to come back, okay? Just come back to me.”

_just come back_

Keith just stares, and suddenly he’s somewhere else. Somewhere in a memory.

_“...just don’t forget to come back,” Keith is saying, a smile on his face but feeling like his insides are falling apart._

_“Of course,” Shiro says, grinning. “Just a quick mission to outer space, no big, only a year, right?” he says with a laugh, and Keith forces a laugh, because Shiro doesn’t know, he_ can’t _know. Keith has tried to figure out how to tell him how he feels, but now Shiro is leaving and it won’t matter for a year;_ Keith _won’t matter for a year. The kind of life Keith imagines for himself could never be real, anyway. So, Keith will just wait. He feels like he’s spent his whole life waiting._

_“Don’t worry,” Shiro says, giving Keith a lingering look that Keith doesn’t quite understand, but for some reason Keith feels like he’s supposed to understand. “We’ll--” Shiro starts, looking at Keith seriously, his eyes soft, but unreadable. He starts over: “I’ll be fine,” he says, but it sounds as though he means something else._

_Shiro isn’t fine._

_Somehow, though, somewhere in the pain of losing him, Keith always knew he’d come back. And when he does, Keith’s entire life changes in the blink of an eye. Everything happens so fast and so hard that Keith sometimes doesn’t know which way is up._

_So, he’ll just wait._

Keith takes a shuddering breath, the living room angling sharply around him, and he runs for the stairs, taking them two at a time, not stopping until he reaches their room, _it’s not their room, it’s not even a room at all._

He turns when Shiro comes in behind him, deep concern etched on his face, and Keith feels sick at the sight of him. _He isn’t real. The real Shiro is somewhere else, somewhere with the rest of the team, somewhere in the real world where Voltron exists and Keith is one of its pilots, somewhere the universe needs him, somewhere the two of them are just friends. But somewhere where Shiro is waiting for Keith to wake up._

“You’re not real,” Keith says, but it hurts, _this life with Shiro isn’t real. They don’t share a house with their friends, Keith doesn’t drive a motorcycle, they don’t have a dog._

“Of course I’m real,” Shiro says softly. “I am, and I love you.”

Keith feels some part of his resolve weakening, _no, no it can’t_ , because those words feel like a dagger in his heart. _They’re not real._

“I’m leaving,” Keith says, trying to hold on.

“You can stay,” Shiro says reasonably, a small smile on his face. “Just stay with me.” _Keith wants to._

“I--I have to leave,” Keith says, the words dragging themselves from his mouth. “The universe needs me, it needs _Voltron_.”

“What about me?” Shiro asks, eyes miserable and voice breaking, and Keith wants to scream. “Don’t you love me?”

“I always have,” Keith manages, heart twisting. “But this isn’t _real_.” _You have to wake up,_ Keith thinks he hears.

“But isn’t this what you’ve always wanted?” Shiro asks, and Keith looks around at their small but tidy room, Shiro’s jacket on the chair, Keith’s schoolbooks piled on the desk, the sounds of his friends downstairs in a happy house, at Shiro standing in front of him, heartbroken, offering it all. _Please come back,_ the words echo in his head.

“I’m sorry,” Keith says with a gasp, unsure if he’s saying it to Shiro or himself.

Keith slams his eyes shut before he can change his mind, focusing everything he has on Voltron, on Red, on his tiny house left behind in a desert on Earth, on an alien castle spaceship where he found a family, on Shiro, _the real Shiro_ , with his cybernetic arm and Galra imprisonment and a smile like the sun and how Keith will always love him, even if he doesn’t feel the same.

The world tilts with a roar, and Keith wakes up.

*

Things after are mostly a blur; he remembers a lot of loud noises and bright lights, _and Shiro, of course Shiro, grabbing his face frantically and saying his name with unflinching relief_ , and Allura has him go directly back into a healing pod because the amount of time he spent under the spell weakened him pretty significantly. Once he emerges he also has to expend a considerable amount of time and energy forcing his mind to clear out, _to forget_ , what the spell made him see. At the very least nobody has asked what it was, but even without speaking a word of it aloud it all still swirls around seemingly on a loop in his brain.

It hurts.

He knows that that was the point; it was supposed to try to break him, but he’s angry and upset with himself that he was so easy to crumble. He’s got to be stronger if he’s going to be any use to the team, and he fully realizes that his endless pining after Shiro should be the first thing to go.

Of course, it’s not that easy.

He tries to distract himself with training, and reading, but he finds himself focusing on another aspect of his time under the spell that continues to nag at him until he realizes that there might be a part of it that could be possible in this life, in _real life._

He finds Lance, Hunk, and Pidge in the kitchen one afternoon after a training session and steels his resolve. He didn’t expect the spell to affect him in any positive way, but if there are things he can change, mostly about himself, he feels like he owes it to himself to at least try.

“Guys, um,” he starts, and all three heads swivel in his direction. He takes a deep breath.

“I know you guys were all friends before we got here, before Voltron, but,” he pauses and nods, thinking about a shared house and a close group of friends. “I’d like if we could _all_ be friends. I’ll try harder.”

He’s met with a few confused stares and a few confused blinks.

“Mullet,” Lance sighs exasperatedly. “We _are_ friends. How are you this dense!”

Keith blinks, his own turn to be confused, but Lance’s words make some of his anxiety drop away.

“Unfortunately, Lance is right,” Pidge says with a grin. “You threw food goo at a princess to defend my honor, and you always listen to my tech shit without complaining. I’d say we’re friends.” Keith gives her a half smile, tension easing, because he thinks she’s right, and she smiles happily in return.

“ _And_ you’re _my_ rival,” Lance exclaims, as if that makes perfect sense. Keith raises an eyebrow and thinks, well, maybe it does makes sense to Lance somehow, and that seems like enough.

“Actually, I think Keith might be right, we’re not friends,” Hunk says, a mischievous smile on his face and they all look at him expectantly. “We’re _family_!” Hunk finishes, beaming with pride, running around to squeeze as many of them into one hug as he can. Lance groans dramatically, but Keith is suddenly breathing easier, and he’s glad.

“Holy shit,” Pidge says, trying not to giggle. “Do you want some wine with that cheese, Hunk? _Quiznak_.”

“Oh man,” Lance says. “Does space wine exist? I feel like we need some.”

“I know how to make beer,” Keith offers, and is met with three surprised looks, so he adds, dryly, “I lived alone in the desert for a year, I know how make most things.”

“Dude, _sweet_ ,” Hunk says emphatically, and he, Lance and Pidge all start talking over each other excitedly.

Keith smiles.

*

He doesn’t avoid Shiro, not exactly, but he’d gotten so adept at burying his feelings about Shiro that his time under the spell felt like ripping open an old scar. Even if that hidden part of himself wanted more, he was at least somewhat content to let things remain as they were. Being on the same team, working together, _being friends_ , it was enough; he could pretend like it was enough. It beat the alternative: Shiro dead, or Shiro not wanting him around if he knew. But now Keith has memories, _fake memories_ , of something he wants but doesn’t have.

“Hey,” Keith hears Shiro say, and he has to mask his feeling of momentary surprise and fluster that Shiro’s somehow found him in a deserted corner of the Castle absently sharpening his knife. He happened upon this spot a while back and since there’s a nice floor to ceiling window with a high view of whatever the Castle is currently facing, he comes back every so often to be alone because he’s never seen anyone else even near it before. He assumes Allura and Coran are the only other ones who even know it exists. 

“Hi,” Keith replies, dropping his gaze back to the knife in his lap.

“Can I sit?” Shiro asks and when Keith nods he folds himself down so they’re sitting side by side on the floor before the window. Keith’s heartbeat quickens at Shiro’s proximity and he angrily pushes down the feeling and roughly gives his knife another swipe before sheathing it.

“I was looking for you,” Shiro says, and even though Keith’s not looking at him he can tell Shiro is watching him.

“You found me,” Keith says, then looks up sharply. “Did you know I’d be here?”

Shiro unexpectedly blushes and Keith raises an eyebrow in confusion.

“Yeah, I--” Shiro starts. “Well, I didn’t know for sure you’d be here, but, um, I know you come here sometimes.”

“What--really?” Keith asks, even more confused.

“Yeah, um,” Shiro says hesitantly, looking away and out the window. “I’ve seen you here before.”

“I’ve never seen you,” Keith says, wondering if he’s somehow missed something obvious.

“No, I--” Shiro says, looking at him again and giving a small laugh. “I saw you here but it seemed like you wanted to be alone, so, I just left you to it.”

“Oh,” Keith says, still not quite understanding and wondering how he hadn’t known he wasn’t entirely alone. “I like the view,” he says, shrugging.

“It’s nice,” Shiro says with such a soft, familiar smile, and Keith has to look away from him.

“Listen,” Shiro says after a moment, and he sounds serious enough that Keith turns to him again. “I won’t ask what happened when you were under that spell,” Shiro starts, and Keith feels his heart twist cruelly but schools his face carefully blank. “But whatever it was, I’m glad you were able to get out of it.”

“Yeah,” is all Keith says.

“I talked to you a lot,” Shiro says, self-consciously running a hand through his hair. “Lamely begging you to wake up, as if that would help.” _You have to wake up_ , Keith remembers, _please come back_ , and he looks at Shiro in surprise. _Keith heard him._

“And, um,” Shiro continues, eyes still serious. “I have to tell you that--um--wow, this is harder than I thought,” he gives a nervous little laugh and turns pink and Keith can only blink at him, mystified. “Sorry, I--” Shiro says, desperate but also kind of shy, and Keith raises both eyebrows in silent question. “I just--” Shiro starts again, and finally looks Keith straight in the eyes. “I love you, I’m _in love_ with you, and I needed to tell you.” Keith feels like the floor is dropping away underneath him and he feels his heart start to race.

“What?” he manages, voice unsteady.

“I do, I love you, I have for a while,” Shiro says with a sad sounding laugh and shaking his head slightly as if he can’t believe what he’s saying. Keith can’t either. “When you were in that spell coma or whatever, I--I promised myself I’d tell you if you would just wake up, so, I’m telling you.”

Keith hears a rushing in his ears but thinks it might be his own heart pounding and he swallows thickly.

“Is this real?” he asks, knowing that it is but needing to hear it, anyway.

“Yeah,” Shiro says sheepishly and a little sadly. “Things don’t have to change,” he says quickly, avoiding looking directly at Keith. “And I’m really sorry if this screws things up between us, seriously, but, I just needed you to know.” He makes as though to stand. “I’m gonna go, but--”

“It was you,” Keith says, a little hysterical, desperately grabbing Shiro’s arm to stop him from standing, and Shiro blinks at him in surprise.

“What?” Shiro asks. “It was me, what?”

“It was you I saw under that spell, telling me _this_ ,” Keith says, fingers tightening, pulse fluttering, and Shiro’s entire face registers shock and recognition. “You told me you loved me, and I wanted to _stay_ ,” Keith says, feeling like the world has finally reasserted itself, like a constant pressure on his skin is lifting. “I love you, too,” he finishes, and saying it out loud makes thoughts of the spell fade away, almost like they happened to someone else.

“Really?” Shiro asks, halfway between astonished and thrilled.

“Yeah, really,” Keith says, an incredulous smile creeping onto his face.

“Woah,” Shiro says, smiling, and Keith feels calm, like a wave of tension has drained out of him all at once in mere seconds.

“Yeah,” Keith agrees.

“So, um,” Shiro says, biting his lip and looking shy again. “Now what?”

“You should probably kiss me,” Keith says wryly, feeling his face flush but tugging Shiro closer, because that should be obvious, it’s the most normal thing in the world.

“Yeah, that--” Shiro leans toward him and drops his gaze to Keith’s mouth and Keith flushes more but decidedly doesn’t mind. “Yeah, I definitely want to, so--”

Shiro cuts off when their lips inevitably meet, and it’s this, _this_ , a nice, soft kiss, that finally, _finally_ , makes Keith forget all of the others that weren’t even real. They pale in comparison to the real thing, to a real kiss with a real Shiro, who has flaws and issues, but also hopes and dreams and a big heart and a brilliant soul, and who Keith isn’t sure even likes dogs. 

When they break apart, Shiro keeps their faces close together, gently putting his metal hand against Keith’s cheek, and Keith takes a deep, easy breath.

“Woah,” Shiro says with a laugh, eyes bright, and Keith smiles.

“Not bad,” Keith says and Shiro laughs again.

“Yeah,” Shiro says, dropping his hand to lace their fingers together. “I can’t believe we waited so long. Kinda feels like we were asleep the whole time.”

“Yeah,” Keith agrees, heart feeling light. “I know exactly how you feel.”


End file.
